.Wednesday, January 27, 2010 ' 8:54 PM Y
live & regret.
Currently tuning into: Nidji - Jangan Lupakan On This Day In Your Life Farah, God Wants You To Know..
that what you are most afraid of is where your greatest rewards are. If all you had to do was wish for something and you would have it, life would be pretty boring, wouldn't it? God placed barriers between us and what we want, so we can enjoy interesting and satisfy...ing lives. God hid our biggest rewards behind the highest barriers - our deepest fears. God wants us to face our fears, and hold ground in their presence, and let them go, and that's how we get out biggest rewards. What are you most afraid of? Say it, just start by saying it. Hey guys, I'm at Kuantan now! Ade mase nak holiday lak kan, dah nak finals lak. I'm here to celebrate my grandma's 3rd death anniversary. Okay, so 'celebrate' is not exactly a good word to use, but well, it's this Chinese tradition where you go to their graves on their death anniversaries to offer them food & prayers.
Before leaving.
Arrived yesterday evening, & straight away the whole family went fer dinner at this Chinese restaurant. Whole family, as in granddad, aunties, uncles, mummy, bro, & cousins. Cam dah raye Cine lak dah hahaa. Then got back home & watched Couple's Retreat with Mama Han & Uncle Don. Laughed like mad pigs wey, the 3 of us. Lol. Seriously, tht's one hella hilarious movie.
Today, mummy & I had an appointment at this spa, called Herbaline, that was just behind my house. My aunties, & uncle tried it the previous day, & said it was heaven. N'way, in short, by the time we left we were just so refreshed & happy. Mummy actually came to the point where she wanted to come again tmrw. LOL.
Before leaving.
The place was really heavenly, with all sorts of relaxing aromas in the atmosphere. First, had a foot bath, then had a facial & massage. As usual, I started pouring tears out due to the terrible pain of having blackheads squeezed out of my face. Pfft. Other than that, had my eyebrows shaped. The massage was fantastic, seriously. After months of working out at the gym I didn't realise just how tense my body was until just now. Apart from tht, we were served some sort of tea. The 1st one was something like red dates tea & after the massage a refreshing lemongrass beverage. Finally, we had fish spa. The one where, you dip your feet in a pond & the fish come up & eat the dead skin cells on your legs. Damn tickly, but fun. Haha.
Fish spa.
My fat legs. HAHA.
Mummy's. damn a lot. 0.0
& all that fer what, RM28. No joke la sial. First trial, it's rm28, & after that the normal price is rm79. If you think rm79 is expensive, fyi, a normal facial, the average price is Rm100-Rm200. & we already booked a session a few days before CNY. 'We', as in, mummy, myself, my 3 aunties, & possibly 3 uncles. Hahaa.
After the spa session went to my grandma's grave, then went shopping with Uncle Don & Mama Han. Was supposed to buy shoes & clothes; ended up buying soya bean & Red Bull. Wtf. then we went jogging at Taman Gelora, near the beach. 3km, maunye xmati aku. Even the Red Bull I drank didn't help much.
T_T
Half dead by night. Lol.
The other day, I drove Papa's Wira, since my Kancil's at the workshop. & the very day I happen to have no P stickers is the very day got road block, twice. Nasib baik muke aku lpas. HOHO. Always reckoned that I would never be able to drive a big car, but after trying, it wasn't that bad. It's true really, that in life, to be able to make it, you have to dare to do it.
Jungle Jungle. A few days back, waiting fer mummy to finish shopping.
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i'm okay, until i realise that things will never be the same.
.Sunday, January 24, 2010 ' 12:32 AM Y
live & regret.
would it be nice to hold you,
would it be nice to take you home,
would it be nice to kiss you.
jangan pernah lupakan aku,
jangan hilangkan diriku,
jangan pergi dari aku.It's been awhile, I've noticed.
& I've been missing you a lot, to be honest.
I love you.
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i'm okay, until i realise that things will never be the same.
.Friday, January 22, 2010 ' 1:42 PM Y
live & regret.
Currently tuning into: Hilary Duff - Now You Know On This Day In Your Life Farah, God Wants You To Know..
that there is no need to obsess over a decision. God has more in store for us then we can ever predict, and what we fear are bad choices frequently turn out for the best, because our hidden aspirations know better where we are going than our rational minds. So. Yesterday I was busy checking my courseworks mark on the notice boards at uni & saw Ms. Paveena, my English lecturer from 1st sem. Was about to open my mouth & say hi, when suddenly she was like "Oh my God Farah! You look so different!! You lost so much weight!" basically leaving me there with a 'wtf' face. & then she was asking me how I did it & wanted to follow. HAHA wtf.
It feels good, to know that others see me as a completely different person. It feels good, knowing that in the midst of changing myself I ended up inspiring others to be stronger too. I went through a whole lot to gather myself back altogether, physically & mentally, & now here I am, the same old person but with new ways.
I rmbr Haikal texting me after lpaking during New Yr's Eve. He said,
"Hbat la u Frh, Sblm & slps..Sbnrnye I da lme bce blog u, yg lame & yg br..mmg ssah gurl nak jd kuat semangat cam laki..biase la ati gurl en..pfft..hahak. So far I dah nmpk la improvement u..not..bad..truskan.." Words of encouragement from a good friend. Ahaha.
Random, before going fer uni.
The old TA7, from Sem 1.
Finals in two weeks time. My coursework marks? Satisfactory I suppose. I'm official on study break right now, skipped class today. Hoho. Wish me luck. ;)
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i'm okay, until i realise that things will never be the same.
.Saturday, January 16, 2010 ' 3:24 PM Y
live & regret.
Currently tuning into: Britney Spears - WomanizerOn This Day In Your Life Farah, God Wants You To Know..
that God loves in you even that which you dislike. God doesn't partition you into pieces and loves some and not loves others. That's what people do. That's what you do. God, who created you, accepts and loves every little part of you, even those you deny and hate in yourself. So next time you try to dislike a part of you, just pause, look and remember that God loves it. 15th January 2010. I shall remember this date as one of my extreme records of being in the gym. HAHA. Yesterday went fer belly dancing & Latin dancing in the morning. Was there from like 10-1:30. Had lecture in the afternoon, which was supposed to finish at 4, but ended at 3. So, went to the Internet Lab & myspaced until 5-ish. Then headed back to the gym. Was so freaking tired, so after parking my car I fell asleep in the car fer like 20 minutes. HAHA. After that went to the gym, did 2 hours of cycling(2 classes), & a Zumba class. By the time I reached home it was 11-ish. Pfft. Altogether, I spent like almost 8 hours at the gym. Whoaaa. HAHAA. Even Bryan, the cycling instructor said that the gym was like my second home already. Hehee.
When I first started this overly-obsessive addiction of spending my time at the gym, I was sad, depressed, & just wanted something to blank out my mind. Now, it's the only comfort for me, now matter when. I'm happy just being there, even if it's the same old routines each day. Not going fer a day, & I get unhappy, moody. But hey, it's a healthy & good addiction ain't it. ;)
Korg pokai psl mkn, shopping semue kan. Aku lak, pokai psl pe, parking. Wahaha. Stupid Sunway. Last time it was RM1 fer 4 hours, now its RM3 fer 3 hours. Seems like a tiny difference, but it has a blowing effect on me now. Last time I only had to pay max RM3 a day, now I have to like from RM4-RM8, depending on how long I go. & x wajib kot klu aku xde kat situ at least minimum 4 jam seari. Pfft.
I'm running out of money wey. Hols are coming, & since papa won't have to send me to uni I won't be getting my weekly rm50 anymore. Sheesh. Want to find a part-time job fer the hols, & if I get kicked out of UTAR I plan on working fer the time being before actually finding another place to study. Being cashless sucks. & I have to save money to buy my own shoes. Sob. There's this Nike shoes yg I b'kenan gle babi, like rm200. o.O On the bright side however, all my clothes are getting too loose fer me to wear, so I'm gonna pow mummy to get me an entire new warbrobe, especially fer CNY. HOHOH.
Anyway, random pics fer the week.
Marketing presentation.
Again, mummy's blazer. Punye la t'kjut aku ble ley pkai. =.=
Randoms, after coming home last night.
Oh, there's that new Chinese series, on NTV7. Weekdays at 10pm, called Friends Forever. Damn nice wey that show! :D
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i'm okay, until i realise that things will never be the same.
.Tuesday, January 12, 2010 ' 8:58 PM Y
live & regret.
Currently tuning into: Ashley Tisdale - How Do You Love SomeoneOn This Day In Your Life Farah, God Wants You To Know..
that it's time you remembered who you really are. You are not your wallet, your job, your kids, your house. You are not your activities or your worries or the labels other people give you. Like an actor you play these roles, and like a good actor you sometimes forget who you really are. Time to wake up now, and remember that you are a being of immense power and breathtaking beauty created in the image of God. Had training today. It was freaking tiring, but I loved it. Shah was nice, most importantly he was gentle to me haha wtf. I was damn scared that he'll torture me like in boot camp. T_T
N'way, first off, did my body analysis. Dropped another 2kg. Not enough, fer me n'way. Was aiming fer 5 at least be the end of the week. Pfft. Pushing too hard I suppose. Hahaa. Didn't dare eat fer the whole day, takot naik skilo lak lps mkn. HAHA. Mummy lg dahsyat, told me to not drink water too, cuz this morning after drinking coffee she went up 1kg. LOL. I was like, wtf, you want me to pengsan during dance class is it? Sheesh.
After that, Shah asked me to do my warm up, then we started our weights session. Told him I wanted to concentrate more on weights, since I was fine with the cardio part. Got kinda scared when he brought me to the area where all the big buff guys lift their weights HAHA. But it was fun actually, though doing squats with a 20kg barbell on my shoulder was no joke. My legs were trembling. Pfft. I enjoyed it though. Chit chatted a bit, so wasn't really boring. Mainly it was about exercise routines & stuff. Then Sheera just had to come up & chit chat with Shah while I was doing lunges. Ngok nye mamat, u wat I nervous kot. Hahaa lol. Oh, & found out from Shah that Nizam blik kg. Weirdly, in Negeri Sembilan too. Seriously, am I gonna end up marrying some dude from N9 or something? LOL.
After finishing our session, was supposed to go for cycling & belly dancing, but was so pning that I decided against it, & retired fer the day. Kang nnt xpsl2 pengsan. Pfft. Gah. Another 6kg to go, before I will be 100% happy about my weight. :D
1st round at the gym.
Back home.
Remember this bear? Hahaa. Yeap, the one Amin gave me. It's been with me fer a yr now. Amin gave it to me on the 29th of December 2008. Seriously I swear to God I love this bear so goddamn much. Not b'cuz it's from Amin, but b'cuz of the fact that it's been the very comfort to me everytime I feel like I'm losing it. It calmed me down like a drug whenever I cried my eyes out. It gave me the feeling of somehow having Amin around. Rawrrr. Funny what a
soft toy, can do to a person.
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i'm okay, until i realise that things will never be the same.
.Friday, January 8, 2010 ' 8:59 PM Y
live & regret.
Currently tuning into: Leona Lewis - I See YouOn This Day In Your Life Farah, God Wants You To Know..
that you have to pass through a dark night of the soul. Everyone does, including you. A time comes when what you have always believed is true melts away underneath you. When you cast in doubt even the most obvious, the most simple. When it seems that dark night is all around, and you are all alone. Take heart, this journey through abyss is the final barrier before your emergence into the heavenly light of a new synthesis of your being. God is waiting for you on the other side. Heyyy! Miss me? HAHA. I know, haven't blogged in a long while. Not much updates really, haven't had time to actually blog since every single time I'm on I happen to be busy at myspace. Approving & replying pages of friend requests & cmnts is no joke, really. Lol.
So, how's the 1st week of 2010 been fer me? In general, so far so good. I've been happy & content, keeping myself occupied at the gym, with a utterly over-obsessive addiction to dancing. Ahaha. Been to many dance classes so far: Zumba, Belly Dancing, Hip-hop, Latin Mix. I loved dancing as a kid, dancing on the school benches with Rj. HAHAA. :P
Oh, & since my membership expired last week, mummy renewed mine fer another yr. Yeay! She didn't renew hers, felt like she won't be in any mood to go. Calvin also gave me 2 free personal sessions. Wanted Nizam to train me, but since he was quitting they left me in another personal trainer(PT)'s care, Shah. Yea, all the PTs are guys now. Seronok la akuh HAHAHA. (P.s, let's hope none of the PTs read my blog. Ahahah..) N'way, will be having my 1st training session with Shah on Tuesday. Up to date, lost 10kg. Trying hard to lose another 5kg by then. :|
Oh, & after that I'll be training with Nizam! Yeay! Haha. Texted him the other day, & asked him why he resigned. Said he didn't want to get transfered, so he resigned. Then told me he'd be joining back as a member to train his old clients, & asked me to train with him. Said that we could make it fun. Hahaa. Rawrr. Can't wait man, mesti besh gle. :D
Even mummy was excited. & exaggerated by saying that after this I can ajk him go dating & he'd make a perfect son-in-law & stuff like that. HAHA. Duhh mummy ni, melbih2 tol. But I miss him actually. Not seeing him this whole week, xbiase kot. I'd admit, I've fallen fer some dude that I've seen fer more than 2 yrs but nvr really taken note of. Wtf. It's like Amin all over again, except that this time it's most probably a guy I can't have. T_T
N'way, finals are on the 1st of Feb. & I'm screwed. Besides that, I cut my hair. APT, you suck. Mhal gle babi nak mampos okeh! =.=
Signing off now, I'm tired. Lack of carbs I suppose. Lol. Nitees.
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i'm okay, until i realise that things will never be the same.
.Friday, January 1, 2010 ' 3:30 PM Y
live & regret.
Currently tuning into: September - Cry For You On This Day In Your Life Farah, God Wants You To Know..
that it's your heart that knows who loves you, not your ears or eyes. Listen to the words, and you can be fooled. Look at the actions, and you can be fooled. Feel deeply into your heart, and then you will know the truth. Who makes your heart soar now? Well, what are you waiting for?Last night? AWESOME okay!! Haha. Celebrated it with Haikal, Saleh, & Aben at Sunway.
N'way, after class, went to the gym. Nasib baik dpt parking ouh. Pfft. Saw Nizam there; his last day of work kot. Oh, Nizam's one of the personal trainers, he did a session with mummy when we 1st started. Wanted to have my 2 free sessions with him, but Calvin, the sales manager said he was stopping. Gah, I'm gonna miss him wey. Wondered who 'N' was? Well, there's your answer. Camne ley minat kat die pun xtau. HAHA. & I barely know him. Always say hi though. Wanted to text him, but seemed kinda awkward. Wtf. Mummy was hinting that he'd make a perfect son-in-law. HAHAHAA. I think she suspected that I like him. :|
N'way, since gym was closing at 8, left by 7.50, after getting all ready. Walked around, waiting fer almost half an hour fer Nad to come. After that, we both waited fer the guys to come. Went to Pizza Hut to have dinner. Kene tunggu oh, damn a lot of people. Had fun at the table, laughing, sharing each others hopes & resolutions fer 2010. A small fight broke out at the table though, between Nad & Saleh. Told Nad to not start spoiling the mood & to lay it down. N'way, managed to save the situation in time. Fer now though. LOL.
While waiting to be served.
Nad. This may possibly be the very last pic I'd ever take with her.
Why? I'll explain later.
After makan went to the game arcade. Aben, yg gle addicted main DDR, played like mad, until eventually he ended up competing with this Chinese dude that was damn friggin pro. Pfft. Actually promised that I'll challenge him, but after seeing the huge crowd there I chickened out. HAHA. Before leaving the arcade however, the only couple among us, Saleh & Nad, got into a fight, again. & trust me, it's like a damn stupid reason to actually argue about. & I mean
stupid, big time. So, while Nad became like a total idiot running away while Saleh went looking fer her, Haikal, Aben, & I walked together to the Sunway entrance fer the countdown.
Candid. Ahaha. Haikal was damn proud to wear my university id. LOL. Said he liked my photo there, 'nmpk cam dak skema'. HAHA wtf. -.-
Sooo. The three of us went out, then searched fer the two lovebirds. Found Nad, so I went up to her, & again, told her to stop fighting with Saleh. For God's sakes, it's the last year or 2009, wajib ke korg gado lg? To my utter surprise, before I could finish what I wanted to say she shouted at me & told me to shut up. Pergh, pompuan, ko x bikin pnas lak ati aku kan. Pe lg, sound ah. Shut up huh? I shouted louder at her, saying that she had no fucking right to tell me to shut up.
Lantak ah, ko nak org usha kan, so aku gempakkan lg ah keadaan. Ko igt ko sape, nak suruh aku diam. Bajet aku kan diam2 camtu je? HAHA. Ko igt aku xreti, xbrani nak sound ko blik? HELLO. Aku, dah bkn Farah Alia yg dlu ok. Skang ko jgn igt aku ni snang nak kene buli ngan ko, or ngan sape2 je la. Dahlah gado psl perkare bodo. Saleh just nak phone ko kan. Melainkan ko ade bende nak sembunyi, ssah sgt ke nak bg? Oh wait, mmg ko ade bende nak sembunyi kan? HEEE. Ni br cpl, lom kawen. Bende kecik, wat jd cam dunia dah b'akhir. Cam dak kecik je, xmature lgsg.
Come on ah, Saleh ley dpt yg better dr ko la wey, sorry to say. Ko lgsg xreti menghargai org2 yg syg ko. Jgn ckp Saleh ah, aku & Bell pun ko xreti nak menghargai, nak pggl bestfriend la konon. Sedangkan kwn baik ko dah gi Melaka study pun ko xtau. Then, ble diri sendiri dah wat slah, ley gi slahkan satu dunia. Saleh tu dah kire baik gle ah, ttap b'than ngan prangai ko tuh. Aku simpan je slame ni, tp mlm tu, ko mmg melampau ah. Org semue nak happy2 msuk 2010, ko lak mmg xkan puas ati slg ko xdpt hancurkan mood semue org. Hah, nak suruh aku diam. That, happened around 10 minutes before midnight. She went away, & we all ignored her. Kesah ah wey! People had already started spraying their snow sprays. Lol. Haikal, disappeared fer a few minutes & came back holding 2 cans of spray. Wtf. Wanted to start spraying, but suddenly we saw 2 police going up to this guy & started scolding him fer using snow spray. But then, everyone started counting down to midnight, & after everyone counted to one there was havoc & everyone was spraying. HAHA. Wat bodo je la abg police hoii. Ngahaha.
We all went mad, spraying like crazy at each other, & I received a blast in the face by Saleh. Msuk mlut la wey! Bwekkk. Got sprayed by people that I didn't know also. Damn funny. Haha. I got lost in the crowd & go separated from them, & while I was busy enjoying myself some dude came up to me, wished me Happy New Year & started spraying me. Haha wtf. Then, pe lg, clubbing hoii! Had to have Haikal looking after me, damn a lot of dudes hanging around eyeing me. Pfft.
All of us, after getting sprayed. Haha.
We all got thirsty, so sat at some place near MOS to lpak2. Saleh was feeling guilty about leaving Nad alone, but I told him to let it off, it wasn't worth his time. He did manage to have fun though, kan Sal? (:
While lepaking, Nad called. I had forgotten tht her keys were with me. So, had to go give it to her. N'way, decided to try again, & asked her why it was so hard for her to just move on & enjoy. Again, she started shouting & said it was Sal's fault fer ruining her night. Haha. Bangang ah betine nih.
Ko mmg nak wat aku malu kan, nak jrit kat aku dpan satu Sunway. Wajib ke ko tinggikan suare? Sal hancurkan mlm ko la sgt, pdhal ko sendiri yg hancurkan. Sal gle xsng ati okeh, aku tau, die nmpk happy camne pun aku tau die pkir psl pe.
Aku kesah lak klu ko rase aku nak kutuk2 ko kat sini. Menyesal gak, aku nak tulis semue ni kat blog aku, psl best friend aku lak tu. Ahh. Wait. Best friend? Aku rase friend pun aku dah xnak ngaku kot lps ni. Dah ckup ah aku bg muke kat ko slame nih. Enough, is fucking enough. Camwhoring before leaving.
Ehh. I forgot what shop. HAHA. Sempat lg doh.
Swt. =____='
We've already been planning, the next countdown's gonna be at The Curve. Early, I know. HAHA. Seriously, the night was damn fun. A lot of myspace friends texted me too, saying that they all saw me at Sunway. Haha.
I started off 2010 as an entirely happy person. & I hope that it will stay that way right until the end. & no cunt is gonna get in my way. One of my resolutions of the yr is just like mummy's; to not care so much anymore.
Oh btw, thx korg, fer the mlm yg gempak! Hahaa. ;D
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i'm okay, until i realise that things will never be the same.